If we don't contemplate our death, how can we really be fully alive? Pre-ordered the book and have talked to my wife about a conservation funeral. Thanks for this kind of information...really love this blog!
I was raised in a cemetery--by that I mean we visited our dearly departed loved ones frequently to tend to their graves. Death is a part of understanding life for me and I'm so thankful my parents chose to raise me this way. After all, death is certain. The child's prayer for me was: Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray thee Lord my soul to keep. Thy love be with me through the night and wake me with the morning light. Fanny Flagg wrote a wonderful book, The Whole Town's Talking, that takes a unique twist on life and death.
I don’t live with a morbid fear, but one thing I always do when I leave our home is tell my wife that I love her. If anything should happen to me before I return, I want those to be my last words to her. Since I have had 2 heart attacks, and once had to be shocked with “the paddles,” that is much more an issue than when we were younger.
In the Season of COVID, Diana's words are very sobering and helpful. We tend to avoid death and talk of death in the U.S., and Halloween skeletons are taken lightly to poke fun at that of which we are "deathly" afraid. I would like my last act to be life-giving for those who will be left when I die.
Since I am very allergic to dairy, I could say that my last act would be to eat a butter scotch sundae while sitting on a deck chair while cruising in the Caribbean. But, actually who knows what my last act will be. Paraphrasing the words of the New Testament, I know neither the day or hour of my death. The best way to plan for the future is to live fully in this very moment in The Way to help save (salve) heal the world. Stewardship of the moment and the resources of the moment is maybe the best that I can do so that whey I die, I will have done my best to save the world. I hope that in my faithful love my stewardship will linger in my children and my children's children's children.
I agree with the concept of preparations to make things easier for the loved ones we leave behind. But I want to direct my comment to the feelings you had when you said the night time prayer. When I read your reaction when I read Freeing Jesus, I thought YES!!! As I knelt by my bed, and my mom listened, I said that prayer, and I thought "I might die and never wake up." It scared me.
A few years ago, as an adult, I came across more benign versions - I wish had had this one to grow up with.
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep;
Angels watch me through the night,
And wake me with the morning light.
I thank you, Diana, for giving voice to thoughts I imagine many children had.
Preparing is so important. A will, trusts, clear instructions regarding power of attorney are all so important. My wife and I have also prepaid our final arrangements. We did that years ago. We've consolidated our assets within one financial institution and provided a list of all needed passwords and their accounts to our son who is the executor. I do hope that we are able to gift much of our 'stuff' soon (we are working on this) as none of our millennial children want to be burdened with cleaning out our house. We have advance directives and they are on file. We've always taken a pretty matter-of-fact approach to this topic which helps. But we don't do the whole skeleton thing. Much more into fall decorations - though I appreciate the more traditional aspects of the Dia de Los Muertos and, in particular, the mass (though I'm not Catholic).
Can't stop thinking about this as I turned 80 this year, am a widow with three lovely daughters to help and am a little unsure about how I want to "leave this world"! No casket funeral for me, but
definitely in my parish church with lots of singing to see me out!
Take it a step further to also plan after death care! After the experience of doing a home funeral for my Mom, I will never do otherwise. An intimate, loving experience with no funeral home involved. Some friends and I who had this experience started a group to help others do the same here in Maine. www.lastthings.net has everything on it you need to know to do a home funeral here. My family story is posted there. Others provide such resources in other states. Check out www.funerals.org for the national network for advocacy and education.
I’m in a monthly discussion group that this evening is considering the question: “What would you do if you knew you had only one month to live?” Will be interesting.
At age 77 my mortality is much on my mind. My mother's death 5 years ago kicked off lots of thoughts of my end as well. She was nearly 96 and tho not in good health still pretty "with it "I miss her terribly. Wish I were more certain about the after-life realities. Sounds like a book I should read. For whatever reason I have not associated Halloween with death necessarily. (Maybe I remember the fun of trick or treat outings in my very small town?) I have often joked that if heaven does not have mountains (and lakes and forests) I am not sure I want to go there! If one is in love with life it is hard to let go of this world - in my view at least.
I find it unnerving that a neighbor of my retirement community, puts up a growing cemetery as part of his/her Halloween “decorations.” So sensitive! Thanks for sharing your family experiences and your consequent reaction to some Halloween decorations! Whatever happened to cute black cats?
Childhood trauma from losing a parent, especially your mother, is a lifelong grief. I lost my mother at age four and she died on October 30th...the church ladies took my younger brothers and me around the neighborhood while the family was at the funeral home on the 31st. Halloween is not high on my holiday list, either...but doing grief work is. Thanks,
If we don't contemplate our death, how can we really be fully alive? Pre-ordered the book and have talked to my wife about a conservation funeral. Thanks for this kind of information...really love this blog!
I was raised in a cemetery--by that I mean we visited our dearly departed loved ones frequently to tend to their graves. Death is a part of understanding life for me and I'm so thankful my parents chose to raise me this way. After all, death is certain. The child's prayer for me was: Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray thee Lord my soul to keep. Thy love be with me through the night and wake me with the morning light. Fanny Flagg wrote a wonderful book, The Whole Town's Talking, that takes a unique twist on life and death.
Hi, I'm reading Freeing Jesus and find many reminiscinces of my journey - some with you in Santa Barbara.
I don’t live with a morbid fear, but one thing I always do when I leave our home is tell my wife that I love her. If anything should happen to me before I return, I want those to be my last words to her. Since I have had 2 heart attacks, and once had to be shocked with “the paddles,” that is much more an issue than when we were younger.
In the Season of COVID, Diana's words are very sobering and helpful. We tend to avoid death and talk of death in the U.S., and Halloween skeletons are taken lightly to poke fun at that of which we are "deathly" afraid. I would like my last act to be life-giving for those who will be left when I die.
How we end is our “lasting Willard testament.” Will it be filled with generosity and gratitude as we leave our lasting mark on those who survive us?
Since I am very allergic to dairy, I could say that my last act would be to eat a butter scotch sundae while sitting on a deck chair while cruising in the Caribbean. But, actually who knows what my last act will be. Paraphrasing the words of the New Testament, I know neither the day or hour of my death. The best way to plan for the future is to live fully in this very moment in The Way to help save (salve) heal the world. Stewardship of the moment and the resources of the moment is maybe the best that I can do so that whey I die, I will have done my best to save the world. I hope that in my faithful love my stewardship will linger in my children and my children's children's children.
I agree with the concept of preparations to make things easier for the loved ones we leave behind. But I want to direct my comment to the feelings you had when you said the night time prayer. When I read your reaction when I read Freeing Jesus, I thought YES!!! As I knelt by my bed, and my mom listened, I said that prayer, and I thought "I might die and never wake up." It scared me.
A few years ago, as an adult, I came across more benign versions - I wish had had this one to grow up with.
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep;
Angels watch me through the night,
And wake me with the morning light.
I thank you, Diana, for giving voice to thoughts I imagine many children had.
Preparing is so important. A will, trusts, clear instructions regarding power of attorney are all so important. My wife and I have also prepaid our final arrangements. We did that years ago. We've consolidated our assets within one financial institution and provided a list of all needed passwords and their accounts to our son who is the executor. I do hope that we are able to gift much of our 'stuff' soon (we are working on this) as none of our millennial children want to be burdened with cleaning out our house. We have advance directives and they are on file. We've always taken a pretty matter-of-fact approach to this topic which helps. But we don't do the whole skeleton thing. Much more into fall decorations - though I appreciate the more traditional aspects of the Dia de Los Muertos and, in particular, the mass (though I'm not Catholic).
Can't stop thinking about this as I turned 80 this year, am a widow with three lovely daughters to help and am a little unsure about how I want to "leave this world"! No casket funeral for me, but
definitely in my parish church with lots of singing to see me out!
Take it a step further to also plan after death care! After the experience of doing a home funeral for my Mom, I will never do otherwise. An intimate, loving experience with no funeral home involved. Some friends and I who had this experience started a group to help others do the same here in Maine. www.lastthings.net has everything on it you need to know to do a home funeral here. My family story is posted there. Others provide such resources in other states. Check out www.funerals.org for the national network for advocacy and education.
I’m in a monthly discussion group that this evening is considering the question: “What would you do if you knew you had only one month to live?” Will be interesting.
At age 77 my mortality is much on my mind. My mother's death 5 years ago kicked off lots of thoughts of my end as well. She was nearly 96 and tho not in good health still pretty "with it "I miss her terribly. Wish I were more certain about the after-life realities. Sounds like a book I should read. For whatever reason I have not associated Halloween with death necessarily. (Maybe I remember the fun of trick or treat outings in my very small town?) I have often joked that if heaven does not have mountains (and lakes and forests) I am not sure I want to go there! If one is in love with life it is hard to let go of this world - in my view at least.
I find it unnerving that a neighbor of my retirement community, puts up a growing cemetery as part of his/her Halloween “decorations.” So sensitive! Thanks for sharing your family experiences and your consequent reaction to some Halloween decorations! Whatever happened to cute black cats?
Childhood trauma from losing a parent, especially your mother, is a lifelong grief. I lost my mother at age four and she died on October 30th...the church ladies took my younger brothers and me around the neighborhood while the family was at the funeral home on the 31st. Halloween is not high on my holiday list, either...but doing grief work is. Thanks,